I have been a consultant and workplace facilitator for 20+ years working in a multitude of industries including such diverse groups as: hospitals, medical practices, CPA and law firms, banks, non-profits, government, retirement, hospitality, car dealerships, and education. Working within these various industries gave me a window into the intimate workings and management systems of these numerous entities. What I discovered was that although each industry believed they were different, they actually all had more in common than differences. They all provide a service and it didn’t really matter if you called your customer a client, a student, a resident, a patient, a member or a consumer. All businesses and organizations are fundamentally interacting relationships, both within the internal community and the external world at large.
So for many years I provided mission/vision retreats, management and customer service training, motivational keynotes, and personal development courses, similarly to what many other people were doing. But in 2000 I had an awakening when I squarely faced what many people are afraid to talk about. And because I am dedicated creating extraordinary workplace cultures, I believe we sometimes need to recognize the barriers in order to eliminate them.
Barriers to an Extraordinary Workplace
My experience both as a consultant and an employee has revealed to me the suffering in the workplace that goes on beneath the surface, like an elephant in the living room. Everyone is afraid to speak of it for fear of recrimination. What I see, to some degree or another, is a web of egos battling and competing for power, managers disempowering employees, coworkers sabotaging and hurting one another. We often have environments fraught with insecurity, fear, internal competition, rivalry, and gossip. In addition, it is a 24/7 world with high unemployment and frequent outsourcing. It is a double edged sword because people need their employment to provide for their families so they feel they have few options.
Is this really happening? Let me share just a few examples of the many situations occurring in today’s workplace. A dedicated young lady who has been teaching for 10 years in a large school district is loved by students and parents. But she recently went on a leave with plans to return to the work she loves only in a part time basis. The politics of her school district and the pressure to teach to certain tests (rather than give students that learning experience she has been doing successfully for years) have so exhausted her that her therapist recommends this change.
The assistant chief of a fire department, a 30 year veteran, is forced to give up his career because of extremely high blood pressure due to political stress and administrative backbiting and sabotage. Although considered a salt of the earth kind of person, the internal competition has depleted his energy as well as negatively impacted his health. He is only 53, much too young to feel forced into retirement.
A manager in a CPA firm who has had great success with clients and in meeting her billable hours quota suddenly has a new senior manager to whom she reports. The new manager is a highly critical person with a micromanager mentality. This new boss creates doubt and anxiety using high control and it is long before the manager begins doubting herself. She finds herself looking over her shoulder and be hyper-vigilant and double checking her work. Afraid to bill for her extra work, her hours go down and her relationships with clients is weakened. This woman begins a confidential job search and, more fortunate than some, finds a new firm. The original firm is surprised she is leaving and doesn’t really know what happened that caused them to lose a great accountant.
Rebuilding Relationships in the Workplace
Having been both the victim of sabotage in previous workplace environments and from a consultant’s perspective, hearing the pain and suffering of so many people, I dedicated myself to helping leaders create extraordinary workplaces with cultures of trust and compassion. I have written a book and have been speaking and conducting workshops on this Personal Restoration Plan to thousands of people:
This work is about rebuilding relationships in the workplace by honoring the spirit in ourselves and in others that resides beneath our self-created identities, which battle and compete for power and validation. This shallow interpretation of ourselves, a shabby imitation we have come to believe is true, belies our incredible authentic power. One day, when fear can be replaced with trust and compassion for one another, there will be a shift in consciousness. People everywhere will be restored to their true identities, their inner spiritual greatness intended by the Creator. To that end, my work is dedicated.
The creation of an extraordinary workplace begins with leadership! Although anyone at any time can awaken to their authentic power, the leaders of the organization have the power to build and/or change the culture.
Secrets of Enlightened Leadership
An extraordinary workplace culture begins with an enlightened leadership model in which leaders embody the very qualities of the organizational vision and values; not simply dictate them. Enlightened leaders operate from authenticity and strength of character rather than egos being driven by the need for power and validation. At all levels, great leaders make a critical difference in the workplace culture by replacing fear with trust and compassion. Teamwork, innovation, productivity, and efficiency emerge and thrive in a trusting atmosphere. Valued employees extend compassion and respect to customers and co-workers. Conversely, the old model of fear-based leadership results in internal competition and rivalry, blocking genuine cooperation and communication.
Authentic leadership is not defined by an organizational chart. Enlightened leadership is the process in which the spirit within the leader recognizes the same spiritual essence in those he/she leads. This recognition provides a conduit or channel of energy that propels everyone involved toward the dedication and action necessary to achieve goals. Now, as throughout time, enlightened leaders can be identified by their traits of vision, courage, compassion, integrity, and humility. They make decisions from integrity and respect for others, building loyalty and commitment. Here are my suggestions and steps to enlightened leadership:
- Look within: Be courageous and place a fixed eye on your own fears and weaknesses. Deep, honest self-reflection is the most crucial step in restoring and strengthening your inner spiritual greatness. Until you can recognize personal doubts and inadequacies, you will project them onto others. Unacknowledged fear becomes disguised as anger, impatience, grandiosity, or even, self-righteousness. It takes great wisdom and courage to own your imperfections and be accountable for yourself; far easier to blame and even shame others.
- Face your enemies: Recognize the opportunity to learn about yourself when you encounter an enemy. Be brave enough to ask yourself the following: why am I threatened by this person, what am I afraid it says about me, and why am I reacting emotionally to this person or situation? Our enemies are defined by whom or what threatens us. The face of the enemy changes based on our circumstances, whether we are talking about individuals, companies or even nations. So the power resides in us to face the real enemy, our own fearful ego. The person or situation that brings up our inner insecurities is actually a gift. As difficult as it is to realize, our perceived enemies teach us to respond from strength, rather than react in fear.
- Acknowledge and appreciate those you lead: Recognition and appreciation are basic human needs. Focus on others’ strengths rather than weaknesses. Consciously give credit and thanks to others, elevating and energizing them. Criticizing those being led depletes their energy and decreases their self-confidence. Demeaning others is like shooting a hole in the gas tank, draining the fuel that drives the organization, and wondering why we aren’t getting better mileage.
- Give up the need for external validation. Great leaders never take credit for others’ work and do not need external validation. They accept responsibility and even blame for unexpected consequences. Ego driven leaders, fueled by artificial power and arrogance, like to claim victory, be the star, control others, and appear superior. These behaviors cause insecurity, distrust, anger and doubt in others. Dysfunction, drama, and sabotage erupt, limiting the achievement of organizational goals.
- Be open minded and approachable: Be present and genuinely listen to others by first giving up judgment, pre-conceived ideas and personal biases. Start from a place of equality and respect, regardless of titles or positions within your organization. Invite others to contribute. Be willing to be wrong or to not have all the answers. If you seek only people who agree with you and who validate your ego the organization is deprived of new ideas and innovation.
I have discovered that what looks like leadership is often based on artificial power. Enlightened leaders are operating from authentic power, which is love. Love is power which sustains all life and shines equally on everyone. It is not weakness but the highest level of genuine strength and power.
As leaders, consultants, HR professionals, I challenge you to notice the ego behaviors in organizations, but not be deceived, confused, or beguiled by them. Recognize a problem that goes untreated and instead, help those who are controlled or demeaned by the dysfunction. I believe kindness is in short supply in the workplace and cutting through the fog of deception can help liberate millions of people from an invisible form of slavery. But to do this, we must all embody the powerful traits of enlightened leadership.
